Thursday, December 30, 2010

Happy New Year's

I had the misfortune to draw the mornin' milkin' shift for New Year's, so I won't be able to raise hell with my friends and imbibe on expensive micro brews all night.

So instead, I'll just hang out for a little bit, maybe have a beer or two, then head off to the parlor. After the girls are milked, I'll take the ol' muzzlebanger for a walk on the farm and see if I can add to the freezer for the new year.

I've tried milking drunk before. You can do it, but it sucks. And shootin' a gun while nursin' a hangover is one of life's shittier pleasures.

So that said, I hope y'all enjoy your New Year's celebrations. I hope some of y'all get shitty drunk and start doin' body shots offa someone's grandmother, since I can't do it myself. And if you feel the urge to drive after ya been drinkin', just do us all a favor and hurl your body repeatedly against a brick wall until you're unconscious. It's a lot easier than bein' in a wreck or dealin' with the 5-0.

Y'all take care now.

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Merry Christmas to All!

My good buddy James, who in my biased opinion is one of the better picture-takers on the east coast, spends more time on the internet than I do. Therefore, he finds all the good swag and lets me know about it. He sends me stuff pretty regularly, and hunting season is slowing down, so I'll be coppin' out and usin' his stuff every now and then.

This week, just in time for that thoughtful, but late, Christmas gift, he's sent this little gem. Perfect for a knife/gearhead/redneck aficionado such as myself. You might want to take it outta your wallet before you fly though, or the ragin' bulldykes at the TSA will be grabbin' more than your junk.

I hope y'all have a Merry Christmas! Enjoy the privilege of giving and spending time with your families. After all, regardless of what the retailers say, that's what it's all about.


Illegal Download of the Post

In the spirit of the season, I'm posting a collection of All-American Christmas carols by a nationally-recognized, esteemed recording artist. These carols are beautiful, well-performed, and politically correct on all fronts. Enjoy!

Song: All-American Christmas Carols
Artist: Larry the Cable Guy
Video: Git-R-Done Live (2003)

Y'all take care, now.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Ron & Bill's Bucks

Ron was kind enough to send pictures of himself and Uncle Bill with their bucks...

Ron had put a shot on this deer the first Saturday, but it wasn't a righteous shot. The buck made the mistake of rollin' past him again though, and Ron plugged 'im good the second time around.

This would have made a hell of an 8-pointer had a recent fight not busted off his other side. You could see where the other buck's antler jammed into the base and popped it right off.


Illegal Download of the Post

I finally got my fingers on a good one the other day. A little back story here.... Whenever Schlongie and I arrive at the cottage, he don't bring nothin' in until the record player is fired up with Johnny Paycheck's 1977 classic, Take This Job and Shove It. It's one of my favorite albums, so years ago I tried to get all of the songs on mp3 to make a disc for the car. I was able to get all but one.... until Tuesday. Best damn tune on the whole album, so I'm pretty happy to have it digitally now. Although the ol' record still sounds better, clicks, scratches, pops and all.

Song: The Spirits of St. Louis
Artist: Johnny Paycheck
Album: Take This Job and Shove It (1977)

Y'all take care, now.

Monday, December 13, 2010


Well, looks like the ol' ought-six will get stuck back on the gun rack, unsatisfied, yet again. Been a few years since I've bloodied her, and I did nothing to improve that on Saturday.

Due to some holiday stuff goin' on, I decided to forgo the trip upstate and hunt at the farm. There's been plenty of deer around there, and I always enjoy getting a chance to hunt and drive with those guys.

To start it off, I overslept, and things just went downhill from there. My little brother Joe went to where I probably would have been and he watched a few deer, including a six-pointer, browse in the swamp below him. We spent the rest of the day driving, had deer moving all over the place, but didn't have standers in the right place to intercept them. A lot of walking, a lot of fun, but not many results.

Good reports from upstate though... Ron bagged an eight-pointer that he missed last weekend, and cousins Nate and Adam got a pair of big does. And the season ain't over yet... there's still late archery and muzzleloader so I might fill another tag before it's all said and done.

The weekend wasn't a lost cause though... when the huntin' was through, I put on my Santa suit and joined a bunch of friends in town for the 6th Annual Gettysburg Santa Crawl. Too much booze, but always a good time. Gets this ol' boy in the holiday spirit.


Illegal Download of the Post

I've been suckin' hind tit on my music duties. It was the thick of the huntin' season, what can I say? For that reason I'll give ya two today...

Song: Country Boy
Artist: Aaron Lewis
Album: Town Line (2011)

Song: Shit Creek
Artist: Bad Livers
Album: Delusions of Banjer (1992)

Y'all take care, now.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Bradford County Bucks

Here's a lil' taste of what we get to chase around upstate. A lot of these bucks were killed within spittin' distance of different properties where our group hunts.

Thanks to Ron for the link.

Monday, December 6, 2010

One Week Down

All kindsa nifty shit goin' on here during deer season.

First off, my time in the woods has been enjoyable but boring. Seen a bunch of baldies, but no bones. I'm out of my element gun huntin' deer... they're runnin' all over the place 'cuz people are chasin' them. I'd much rather have a Hoyt in my hands and have them actin' a little more naturally.

But good things do happen. The ol' man, whose last buck was a legal spike in PA (I can't remember when antler restrictions started, but it's been a while), scored a fine Bradford County 8-point after an exciting afternoon on Friday. My brothers and I have tasted success the last few years, and we were all hopin' to see the ol' man score. The nice doctor chopped on his back last November and he couldn't hunt, so this buck was especially sweet. Ironically, when I relieved the buck of his hair, I found that some ol' boy had a bad day... there was a .30-caliber hole low in the brisket from a not-so-accurate shot, fairly recently. Another 2 inches higher and he'da never made it to Dad, another 2 inches lower and he wouldn'ta lost a hair. I'd like to say he was lucky, but then he made the fatal mistake of rollin' past the ol' man.
On top of that, Ron smoked a pair of does and Uncle Bill got a dandy 1-horned 4-point. Looks like he got a little randy fightin' with another buck pretty shortly before he got shot... the skullcap was still bleeding when Bill caught up with him, and you could see where another antler had gouged in underneath it and popped it off. And of course, there were a few whiffs as well. Ron and my cousin Eric missed a dandy 8-point, and my brother Jesse threw a shot at a buck that was limping. It wasn't a good shot to take, and he missed, but when they're already bitched up the best thing you can do is put 'em on the ground. Much less painful for the deer to die by a hunter than let nature take its course.

Also, my cousin Nate saw a goofy buck that we got pictures of back in July. We hadn't seen him since then, so we thought he might have gotten jacked. Still around, though, but not quite legal. Hopefully he'll make it through the junior hunters this year so we can whack 'im next year.

Another week left, so I'm sure I'll have more for ya soon.

Y'all take care, now.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

First Day Follow-up

Well, as much as I'd like to say me and my family are all tagged out, truth is we didn't see a single antler yesterday at all. Plenty of baldies, but we were hunting in a WMU that is buck only for the first week so we had to let them walk.

All things considered though, we all had a great day. We were treated to a beautiful sunrise and sunset, and great weather in general. We all saw deer, and I saw a big ol' gobbler and had two hens roost right in front of me, as well as a fleeting glimpse of a coyote. That's only the second dog I've ever seen, so that was a treat. He snuck in on my right and was gone before I could even think about getting the gun around on him.

Although we didn't have too much success where we were, my buddy Matt's ol' man, Jesse, and brother-in-law shot an 8-point and 5-point respectively, and Schlongie's ol' man whacked a coyote. Interestingly enough, Jesse's buck lost its antlers shortly after he smoked it. When he first picked up the head after he got to it, the one side fell off, then when he started draggin' the other side went. I'd have to think they were loose to begin with if that happened. Usually they don't start to shed until well into December and January.

Matt also told me about a co-worker's acquaintance in her mid-twenties who shot her first buck yesterday... a 14-pointer with a 20" spread that dressed out at 200lbs. That's a hell of a first buck!

Well, we got another week and a half, so there will be more updates. We can start whackin' does upstate on Saturday, so I expect the ol' Full Rut camp to have plenty of venison on the ground.

Good luck and happy hunting in the meantime!

Y'all take care, now.

Monday, November 29, 2010

One of the best days of the year!

Opening day of the PA buck season... Need I say more? I've seen several doe, but no buck yet. A few more hours left in the day, so I'll hope for the best. Updates to follow after dark...
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Thursday, November 25, 2010

Thanksgiving Geese

I'm not sure exactly when it started, but as long as I can remember, Dad has taken us boys out for a waterfowl hunt on Thanksgiving Morning. We've had a few stinkers, but for the most part there's been a lot of action and some awesome memories. I can only think of two or three occasions where one of us has missed it. It's a much of a tradition for us as the turkey is for everyone else.

We did well this morning. Joe started off by dropping a drake woodie that snuck into the decoys. We wound up with seven geese and four ducks. Another exciting and memorable hunt for the books.

I should have put this picture in the initial post, not sure why I didnt...

I was doing my best imitation of a retriever dog and got stuck away from the pond when a nice group of geese came in, so I whipped out the phone and took some video. I'm usually too busy wieldin' the ol' meat stick to take video, so it was a nice, rare treat to get some footage. It's grainy, but overall not too bad for a cell phone.

Well, i'm gonna go snag some turkey at the grandparent's house and then head off to spend my afternoon milkin' the cows.

Y'all take care, now.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

What a weekend it was

So bear hunting was quite exciting this year...

After going at it for six years, I finally had my first chance at a Pennsylvania bruin.... and whiffed.

When I heard the twig snap on the edge of the thick shit, I was expecting an ol' whitetail to come barrelin' out. Low and behold, it was a bear. I was completely shocked, but I managed to let loose with the ol' Winchester 30-30, but didn't connect. Put a hell of a hole in a couple different trees though.

But all was not lost. The second drive of the second day, we pushed this 300-pounder (dressed) past one of our gang. After lot of shooting and then an hour up uphill dragging, it was time to celebrate.

Look at the grill on this sumbitch...

It turns out out that it was a research bear, with a collar, ear tags, tattoos, the whole nine yards. That didn't make him dumb, and certainly not easier to kill, just means he went into the pipe to eat a few doughnuts. After getting checked out PGC Wildlife Biologist Steve Rapaski, it was determined that the boar's live weight was around 354.

I took some video at the check station. It's a little long, but it's cool to see the process.

All in all, a tremendously exciting hunt and more great memories for the ol' noggin.

Now, time to switch gears to the buck season opener on Monday. Stay tuned for more...

Y'all take care, now.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

PA Bruins

Ahh, nothin' gets me in the mood to stomp the laurel than a good bear huntin' story.

I also stumbled upon some tips and facts whilst I was beatin' around the interwebs.

When one hunting season ends, my brain automatically shifts gears and starts mentally preparing for the next season. When the sun set on the early archery deer season this past Saturday, I was already starting to get geared up for this coming Saturday, the first day of the rifle season for bear.

For those that haven't done it, bear hunting can be one of the most physically demanding days afield. Some people have been known to climb onto their stump in the dark and sit there all day. My friend never hesitates to rub it in that two of the last three years, he's shot his bear from a treestand about 300 yards away from his camp. Not us, though.

I started goin' up to Bear Camp with the ol' man five or six years ago. I wasn't sure what to expect, but as I stumbled my way into the truck for the ride home on Tuesday after two hard days of hunting, I knew I'd be damn sure prepared for next year.

Our group puts on drives... That's just what they've always done. A group will head out one direction in a truck and start dropping off watchers, and a gang of pushers will jump in another truck and head the other direction. The pushes are usually a mile or so across a mountain face, so you're walking at a downhill slant the whole time. Not only that, but once ya get into the laurel thickets, you're forced to either squirm across the ground like a snake or climb over it like a monkey. Another joy are the low swamps that are clogged with thorn and thistle bushes, or areas known as slashings that are basically hundreds of thousands of saplings growing in very close proximity. Good drivers get into the thickest stuff they can find and plow their way through it, knowing that they won't get a shot themselves but they might push a bruin past other drivers or to the watchers.

By the time four or five drives have been done that first day, it's well into the afternoon and everyone's pretty much bushed. When ya wake up the next morning, your body lets you know that you know you got a good workout the day before. It's rough enough that I don't even put my good deer rifle in the truck to make the trip anymore. It just takes too much of a beatin'. I strap on a Ruger .357 Security Six when I'm pushing and I have a beat-up ol' Winchester 94 30-30 to haul around when I'm watchin'.

It's a lot of work, but it's worth it when you have the whole group gather around that big ol' bruin that didn't manage to elude us.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Adams County WCO Killed in the line of duty...

Some sad happenings in Adams County last night...

Being a WCO is a thankless job, and doesn't pay enough for the risks involved. Some of them are a little rough around the edges, dickheaded if you will, but this wasn't the case with Officer Grove. From what I've heard in the past and have been reading all morning, he was not only a professional, but also a fine gentleman and overall nice guy. He was out to do his job to the best of his abilities, and was more about protecting wildlife and helping people than busting their chops for the small things.

I regret that I never got to meet Officer Grove in person. When I'm not skirting the fine line between legal and illegal, I genuinely enjoy the company of our law enforcement officers and hearing their stories.

Please pray for the Grove family today, and hope that the culprit receives a quick and just penalty.

On that note, I heard over the scanner a little while ago that they may have the main suspect in question collared, although that's not official or confirmed. Shame the little asshole didn't resist arrest and spare us taxpayers the cost of a lengthy trial.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Cuttin' up...

It's true what they say; when the hammer drops, the work begins.

The ol' man was kind enough to take care of the fun stuff on my first few does, but he finally showed me the nuts and bolts of cuttin' up a deer many moons ago when I shot my first buck. I'm now to the point where, although it's time consuming, I take my time and make sure that I do this process right. With all the time, money and work that goes into whackin' a deer in the first place, it's not somethin' that I want to screw up. I also posses a fun little personality trait that causes me to generally hate to pay someone to do something I can do myself. I've also heard horror stories about what comes back from the processor. When I cut a deer up myself, I get to choose how long to age the meat, how I want to cut my steaks, all that fun stuff. I will take my scrap meat to a reputable processor to be turned into pepper sticks, sausage and bologna, but only because I'm not in a position to buck up the money to get all that equipment for myself.

Thankfully, this day in age, the internet is full of great resources. I'm pretty comfortable in my process, but I still like to learn a few things here and there. I stumbled across this forum the other day, and felt it was worth sharin'. This is very similar to how I cut mine up, although I did pick a few more tricks up. It's a great resource if cuttin' up your own is somethin' you ain't done but want to try. Check it out, ya might learn somethin'.

On a side note, I've found that it's a good idea to keep a dry-erase board on the freezer, especially with a chest freezer. Every package that goes in is labeled, and then documented and dated on the dry-erase board. That way, one look at the board will tell you if there's something that should be used. When I take something out of the freezer, I simply scratch it off the board. I won't lie; when I lived with the folks we'd have some meat go to waste because it wiggled its way to the bottom of the chest freezer and wasn't found until it was too late. Perhaps that's why I'm so anal about keeping the freezer organized now.


Illegal Download of the Post

This song was actually, believe it or not, my first legitimate, legal purchase from the iTunes store. It's a good tune, hard, crisp and fast. This is a tune that I wish I had when I played ball... it'll definitely get some use before our next pickup game. Probably NSFW, so put the headphones on.

Song: My Dark Place Alone
Artist: Murderdolls
Album: Women and Children Last (Special Edition, 2010)

Y'all take care, now.

Monday, November 8, 2010

What an amazing weekend!

To me, there's nothing more enjoyable than spending a weekend hanging out with all my buddies and doin' some hunting. So needless to say, I had an awesome weekend! My little brother, Joe, and my best friend's Uncle Tony were lucky enough to fasten their tags on some Bradford County buck ass. Everyone had plenty of excitement, as there were many close calls and tons of good stories from the woods.

The shin-dig afterward was just a great time. There was plenty of cold beer to go around, and the food was top-notch... Hand-picked eye-roll steaks on the grill, grilled sausages and peppers, venison pepper steak, and plenty of other awesome dishes were just what the doctor ordered after a long day afield. There was plenty of good ol' boys and gals there and everyone had a blast. It took some time and money to put together, but it was well worth it.

We also went spottin' up there on Friday night. The difference in the number of deer we see while spottin' up there as opposed to down home is simply staggering. Without too much effort we saw well over 100 deer, including three slammer bucks. It's not the best night we've had spottin' up there, but it was pretty exceptional.

I don't have many good pictures from the party, but dead animal pictures are always awesome...

One thing we try to do is get a group picture for special weekends like Bowhunter's Weekend. It was great to have some critters on the meat pole this year to add to a great picture.

This is my little brother Joe with his first bow buck and his first Bradford County buck, a big-bodied six-point.

This is Schlongie's Uncle Tony. It's far from his first bow buck, but it's also his first from Bradford County, another big-bodied six-point with no browtines.

Oddly enough, these two bucks were harvested within two minutes of each other on different properties.

So now, with one week left of bow season and the rut in full swing, this is the last chance I have to arrow a buck. I may make it out a few mornings this week, and I'll definitely be out Saturday morning before a wedding we have to go to.


Illegal Download of the Post

Sometimes I go for the good ol' random pick. That's where I open up iTunes or Pandora and give ya the first song that comes on. This is one of those days, so here's your pick, courtesy of Pandora...

Song: Simple Man
Artist: Lynyrd Skynyrd
Album: Pronounced 'Lĕh-'nérd 'Skin-'nérd (1973)

Y'all take care, now.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Camp... at last.

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It's gonna be a great weekend...

It's purty much a crappy day out there, but I'm about as excited as I can be. Why? The ol' truck is loaded down and ready to head upstate. Two full days of hunting with my best friends during the peak of the rut, with a huge party to follow. What more could a boy ask for?

I started a little thing we call "Bowhunter's Weekend" a few years ago as a way to get my best friend, Schlongie, and his ol' man, Reds, upstate for a day of good hunting. The three of us went up, had a hell of a time, and Reds managed to arrow a nice 6-point. Now in its fifth year, there will be 12 or 13 of my closest friends and family heading up to bowhunt and/or fall turkey hunt. Ron has graciously hosted us every year, and he puts on a great hunting camp for us. This year, he decided to combine our weekend with a fall party, inviting friends and landowners to come share in the festivities. As you might guess, everyone has been looking forward to this for a long time.

And the rut is definitely turning on. Schlongie and I went spotting around the area last night. We didn't see a lot of deer, but one field held six or eight deer, including a bruiser of a buck. We watched the big boy run off a smaller buck several times, then wander over to the treeline and work over his scrape and licking branch.

And if that wasn't proof enough, I got an e-mail from Ron last night, sent to him by a good friend...

This is the buck Rich and I found behind the barn Sunday evening.
A 2nd buck was hanging around and we were trying to see how close we could get to him before he ran.
They must have got in a fight and the other buck was admiring his kill.
Notice his  eye is poked out.
The other buck was a smaller 6pt. This buck was a huge 9pt.

So needless to say, the deer up there are actively rutting and fighting.

I think we'll have a great hunt with lots of success and stories, and the party's gonna be awesome!

I'm sure there'll be pictures to follow, so stay tuned...


Illegal Download of the Post

What can I say? Steady Teddy is my drink of choice when I'm getting ready to head to the hills.

Song: Stranglehold
Artist: Ted Nugent
Album: Ted Nugent (1975)

Y'all take care, now.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Today is the day. Do your civic duty.

It's election day. That means in a few hours, I will go stand in line at the municipal building, then go stand in a tiny little booth that's too small for my fat ass, and try to decide which dude on the ballot is going to screw me less (or use more lube when said screwing commences), make my mark and hope for the best.

But hey, it is our civic duty to help make the decisions regarding the people making the decisions. That's a privilege that a lot of people in the world don't get, so I'll partake. And besides, if it makes all the ridiculous campaign advertising stop, I'm all for it.


Illegal Download of the Post

These guys wrote a great deal of politically-motivated rock, and they definitely lean far, far to the left. I lean considerably more to the right. However, it stays with the theme of the day, and they made some great angry music. I relied on these guys heavily to get jacked for football games back when I played.

Song: Wake Up
Artist: Rage Against the Machine
Album: Rage Against the Machine (1992)

Go vote! And remember, Republicans, Libertarians, and Tea Partiers vote on Tuesday. Dimocrats vote on Wednesday.

Y'all take care, now.

Monday, November 1, 2010

It's lonely at the top...

I am fortunate to have a deer stand that I can get to quickly after work, when the neighbors are kind enough not to steal the steps. With the looming time change, this will more than likely be my last week to hunt it. I never see a lot of deer, but it's quick and allows me to reenergize after work.

But I digress... The wind is perfect and it's primetime. I'm goin' huntin'.

Y'all take care, now.
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Thursday, October 28, 2010

Welcome back, y'all!

Yup, I'm back.

For those of you new to the group, I used to run a blog through the newspaper when I worked there, but gave up on it when I left. And for some reason, some people were really disappointed with that and have asked repeatedly to have me start the blog back up.

So, what the Hell. Here I am.

So for the new ones, let me tell ya a little about what to expect...

My first and foremost passion is hunting. Motorcycles run a close second. I spend as much time as humanly possible, and far too much money, doing one or the other. Thankfully, I have a very understanding girlfriend and boss that allow me to go full-bore into those pursuits.

As far as hunting, if it's in season I'll hunt it. My friends and I spend a lot of time hunting in Bradford County, PA, where we stay with our good friend Ron. He takes good care of us, and the hunting is top-notch. It's no less than three hours one way, but always worth the trip. I'll be happy to hunt anywhere, but that's where most of the shenanigans go down.

I'll ride the bike anywhere, too. I have four bikes, most of which are operational. I don't do the gang thing, I mainly fly solo. I mostly putt around town, but I make sure to do at least one, if not more, Iron Butt rides every summer. I've ridden with a great charity group for the last five or six years, and I have enjoyed the relationships that have formed from that group. I don't get into the biker events very much, but I've been known to work security at the events in nearby Gettysburg. The events are too big for my taste, but I like hangin' with bikers.

I grew up more or less on a farm and have been in 4-H forever, as a member and a leader. I still milk cows at my uncle's farm for a little extra coin. Because of that I've always been pretty agri-minded. Not much of a city guy.

I'm a fat guy, so naturally I like to eat... usually as unhealthily as possible. Working at the newspaper has turned me into a minor beer snob, another contributing factor to my waistline.

I like music. Tastes range from old country to classical to new rock. There's a few things I don't care for, but for the most part I am open-minded and enjoy anything with good lyrics or a good beat. I have satellite radio and listen to Pandora at work, so I hear alot. I'll throw out recommendations every now and again to help expand your library.

I enjoy sports, predominantly college football. I've been crucified for my love of the Fighting Irish, the Philadelphia Eagles and the Baltimore Orioles, but they've always been my boys and I won't be swayed any other way. I freely admit that I generally take more pleasure in the losses of our enemies than the wins of my own teams. About the only exercise my TV gets is some sort of sports a few times a week.

I'm a tech geek. I'm a graphic artist by trade, so I've used Macs since I graduated high school. My phone is far smarter than I ever hope to be. I like to get my hands on new gizmos and gadgets and trinkets and play with them.

Most of all I enjoy all things redneck... trucks, mud, blood, mountains, woods, wimmin, guns, beer, shiny objects, Blue Collar Comedy Tour, barns, bows, cows, parties, stealin' signs, dirt bikes and bonfires, just to name a few.

I hope y'all come back and check in every once in a while. I can't promise I'll update more than a few times a week, but I'll do my best.


Illegal Download of the Post

These guys are my favorite to download, since it pisses them off so much. They have enough money, so I'm not to worried about hurting their feelings. They do make some damn good music though.

Song: Orion
Artist: Metallica
Album: Master of Puppets (1986)

Y'all take care, now.